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Posted by / 04-Feb-2017 02:47

Traditionally, most partners of sex addicts have been treated as co-dependents, says Hall.

“The presumption is that the partner knew at some level what was going on and was ‘enabling’ it, which is frankly an insult.

I felt that meant the risk of relapse was too great, so I left.

Either way, you wouldn't be in the minority of adults if you sometimes wished for a new friend or two to enter your life.

Rosendale starts each 12-week support group by educating the women about sex addiction.

“One of the points of this group is to depersonalise it.

To be fair on Rachel’s friends, there is some debate about whether the term sex addiction is scientifically accurate, but the field of addiction is changing fast and emphasis is shifting from the substance to the psychological symptoms of addiction.

“Although there is usually huge reluctance for partners to seek help, let alone come into a group, because of the privacy and shame, something happens in these groups that liberates these women – and I say women because in my experience, it is usually women who access them,” says Rosendale, who still runs the group at the Marylebone Centre, London.Couples who make it work generally take a three-pronged approach, says Hall.“First, the addict goes into recovery on their own to work out causes and develop relapse prevention strategies.“So when he sat me down one day to tell me he was a sex addict, I actually laughed – although I soon stopped when he disclosed night upon night of watching pornography for hours on end and numerous short-lived affairs.My life fell apart.” Sex addiction hurts partners in a way that no other addiction can, says Paula Hall, who has written a book on the subject.

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“These guys, and it is mostly guys, are on the whole loving husbands, yet they did this right under your nose, leaving you unable to trust your partner, or even your own judgements,” she explains.